DONT BE YOURSELF
WHATEVER YOU DO!
THIS IS THE FIRST OF A CONTINUING SERIES ON THE SELF
Some years ago, I saw a great New Yorker cartoon.
The New Yorker is a wonderful weekly, of course, and there are many exceptional articles in each issue but the cartoons alone are worth the price of the magazine.
A middle aged-couple is standing in front of the door to a house.
DON’T BE YOURSELF!
They have arrived at a friend’s house for dinner.
He is about to knock and the wife says to her husband,
Whatever you do tonight, please don’t be yourself.”
OOOPS!
Well, she knows him, I guess, as married people do.
Maybe he knows himself too, but it isn’t likely.
WE DON’T LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT OURSELVES
When we learn about ourselves better, we find out things we don’t always like.
That’s OK, none of us is perfect. (And the couple in the cartoon is still married!)
Mostly, however, we learn things that we do like.
SOMETIMES PEOPLE KNOW THINGS ABOUT US THAT WE DON’T
Is this a problem? Could be, if what we are or do harms others or ourselves.
We can also discover things that we suspected about ourselves but never verified.
That’s why so many people take up new things in mid-life (art, music, or leaving a corporate job to start a small business).
BUT WE MIGHT BE SURPRISED
We wonder how it is that we didn’t know those things about ourselves when we were younger. After all, we do know many things about ourselves.
You know, for example, what kind of food you prefer, what kind of books, movies, plays or games you like.
You’ve known for decades if you are a morning person or a night owl.
That stuff is easy. You learned that by repetition, habit, and observation.
But there’s lots we don’t know.
How could we have missed truly important things about ourselves that perhaps our spouse or mate knows, or our family or friends know, but we do not?
We didn’t pay enough attention to them when we were younger, perhaps.
Or, we kind of remember that we were interested in certain things when we were younger but we dismissed them as not important.
Or, we didn’t even know about them so that we could pay attention to them.
UNRECOGNIZED GIFTS, TALENTS AND ABILITIES
Maybe nobody recognized some of your talents and gifts when you were a child.
The gifts were never developed.
People are busy, Most parents don’t know much about raising this new thing, this person, in their lives.
Many parents are like children themselves, frankly, when it comes to being a parent.
Perhaps they were not raised by experienced parents themselves.
Life is complicated. You may have talents never recognized, let alone nurtured.
DISSATISFIED?
If you are feeling dissatisfied with important areas of your life such as work, personal or family relationships or even your most significant partner relationship, then it’s time to figure out what the hell is going wrong.
THE REAL YOU
Part of the reason you are in the wrong place or in the wrong job or with the wrong person is because you don’t know the real You yet.
Not well enough anyway.
It’s time to find out.
I’m preparing something for you to help you do it.
TIME AND PROCRASTINATION
If this is true for you, isn’t it about time you looked at the question of who you really are?
How might it affect what you choose to study?
What educational program you choose after high school.
College, university, the military, cooking school?
How do you know what to choose if you don’t know yourself.
What happens with many people is they choose a college program, get there. find they hate it or at least are not suited for it.
Now what? Leave, and lose all that money?
Feel bad because you wasted a year?
Don’t procrastinate any longer.
This is the Time to act.
Learn the reasons students drop out and how you can prevent that happening to you.
Join me at DROPOUT TO DEAN’S List and get two gifts: a paper on why so many students drop out and what you can do about it.
AND then, another gift, HOW COLLEGES LIE ABOUT HOW MUCH CLASS TIME YOU’LL REALLY GET.
(Not nearly as much as you think and they imply, that’s for sure.)
Find your true self.
Don’t drop out and not know why.
In fact, don’t drop out at all! Make your first choice your best choice!
I’ll be with you.
Frank
P.S. If you could have done this all by yourself, you would have done it by now.
NEXT: part TWO in this series on SELF.
DO IT YOURSELF: KNOW YOURSELF. ARE YOU? DO YOU KNOW YOURSELF?
Register for DDL right here!
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